Crack Dream
by Pensulliwen
Summary: This is actually a D.Gray-Man, Supernatural AND Pirates of the Caribbean crossover, but apparently that was too hardcore for FF to handle. Yes, this is an actual dream that I had. No, I don't know what's wrong with me. No, I... really can't explain it.


**Crack Dream**

**Disclaimer:** Might make less sense than I thought it did before rereading what I wrote

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So I had the most epic dream ever last night. It was some sort of crazy DGM, PotC and Supernatural crossover. I will be deeply surprised if I am not pioneering that particular combination. It seemed more sense-making when I first woke up, but still it was cool. And I will share it with you all because I feel guilty for not updating Capslock DGM in forever; clearly the crack is taking over my mind without that outlet.

It started with Allen, Lenalee and Captain Jack Sparrow on the run from Debitto and Castiel, because apparently his faction of angels was on the Noah's side at the moment. We will forgive him for that because he is mother fucking Castiel and can do no wrong. Plus Allen and Lenalee at least got a flaily pirate on their side. Debitto and Cas both wanted this translucent dark red marble Lenalee was holding, and Cas had a bunch of angel mooks with him while Debitto had a lot of akuma mooks with him, thus running. Except not with Lenalee's boots b/c apparently her Innocence wasn't working or something due to holding the marble. Eventually the akuma/angels surrounded them so they stopped and Castiel was all "that artifact belongs in heaven :|" while Debitto was more "GIMME /COCKS GUN"

The marble started glowing in Lenalee's hand, so she squeezed it and all of these translucent white orbs popped up, floating around them. They were about head-sized and looked a bit like Timcanpy minus the wings/tail/hand-like-things. Apparently these were DGM-verse angels, basically just the antithesis of akuma, and the marble was a summoning device. So they attacked the akuma as Allen and Lenalee tried to escape along with Jack. One "angel" in particular that they had apparently encountered before was kicking major ass and had evolved, it was about the same color and size as the others but instead of an orb it was just made up of eight wings somehow attached together; they looked a bit like Mugen in the flashback chapters when it randomly had wings thanks to Hoshino's symbolism/drugs. Hopefully mostly DGM readers see this because otherwise none of the terminology here is going to make a lick of sense.

Anyway, somehow the marble got knocked out of Lenalee's hand and roooooolled along the cobblestones until Leverrier picked it up. So Lenalee and Allen were like HEEEELL NO Central in charge of this power= do not want, they will find a way to do horrible experiments with it and shit. Lenalee motioned to the evolved angel and subtly told him *coughsick'im* and the angel made a dive for Vatican Hitler. But alas Leverrier made the marble stop glowing and the angel exploded D: So Leverrier went on a little "THE SERVANTS OF HEAVEN CANNOT BE TURNED ON MEEEE" rant and then a giant tentacle came out from the ocean they were apparently next to now and grabbed him.

Wait, don't close the window. This is probably not what you think it is.

Leverrier was understandably going "WTFBBQ" when Calypso's giant face appeared just under the water and was all "A Gahd's powah should be kept by a gahdess, yes?" and the marble fell into the ocean. Then the tentacle dragged Leverrier down into the ocean, and everyone went D8 except for Jack, who twiddled his fingers at her.

There was kind of a moment of silence after that, as everyone's collective minds went "…. whaaaa?"

So then Debitto started stomping around and shooting at random things, while Castiel was clearly sick of this shit and magically summoned Dean and Sam to the scene. Huzzah. I'm guessing the plan was to have Sam and Dean sick Calypso, considering they have a fairly extensive track record of killing non-Christian gods (for shame) and I dearly, dearly wish that I had not woken up then, but I did. I like to think that it was season six Sam, who is an utter troll and I love him. I also like to imagine that the brothers would have immediately started hitting on Lenalee, and the expressions Allen would have made. Plus if the dreamlogic was at all consistent, her Innocence should have been working again, so a Lenalee/Debitto fight scene could have happened. Alas, we will never know.

I'm guessing that the moral of this story is that I have WEIRD DREAMS when I go to bed before midnight and should never attempt this again. Sleep is for the weak.


End file.
